Chapter 6
"Well, Detective," Mr. Flirtly said, "One of Jessica's friends had phoned us and said that Jake lost his mind, and kidnapped her."
The Detective sat in the living room of the Flirtly Residence, writing down what they say.
"Did this friend of hers describe what happened? Do he beat her?
"No," Mr. Flirtly said, "It was more of a kidnapping. I never knew Jake to be like this. Jessica recently went on about how Jake was becoming compulsive and very controlling. She's in love with this other guy, Dan Crown, I think."
"I've been getting leads," Detective Tracy said, "that she was kidnapped. I'll get the County Sheriff to intervene, and we'll have your daughter back. You don't have to worry."
For the most part, the Detective was right. Sheriff Swine, the County Sheriff for Cooksdale Municipal County, is a total hardass and ruthless bastard of a Police Officer. With him on the case, the suspect would not have wished he was born.
"Oh, so we've got a kidnapping. I'll make sure that he rots in hell for this," he said fiercely, talking on the phone to Detective Tracy, "In the mean time, I'll just place the guy under arrest."
He hung up the phone, and walked over to Deputy Sheriff Porker, his trusty partner and friend.
"Porker," he said, "We've got a kidnapping happening down in the residential district. We've got some possible leads, and we're going to look around town."
"Yes, Sheriff," Deputy Porker said, "but first you have to put on your pants."
"Damn," Swine said, as he looked at his hairy, exposed legs, "I knew I forgot something at home."
While Dan was Pursuing Riesstiu, and the Police were pursuing Riesstiu, things in other parts of the Galaxy things were just rockin', in the bad sort of way.
Ha-ha, funny joke.
"Attack bomber 11 Charlie to Squad, full thrust manoeuvres to target X-T-C-0.45" the Charlie squad leader said over the radio.
Charlie squad, a group of Kushan Attack bombers flew over the asteroid, and turned towards it from behind. Behind meant the opposite direction to where the asteroid was travelling. The direction it was travelling was towards the Mother ship.
"Full power to plasma launchers," the Charlie squad leader said, "and maintain formation, keep it tight, people."
The rock was quickly cracked apart into smaller, more harmless fragments.
The fragments were pushed by inertia, just to tumble on.
The rock was just tumbling on, going were ever a phenomenal force would take it. Just tumbled on and on. It kept tumbling, no matter what.
It tumbled, down a mountainous slope, and onto the road. It tumbled off the road, and kept tumbling onto the slope below.
Dan was driving along, with random boulders tumbling their way down the mountains, and onto the roads.
"Man," Dan said, "This is an insane plan. Now I know why this is called Avalanche Hill."
"No," Edward said sarcastically, "I always thought it was called Avalanche Hill because hot chicks stand on the road, flashing passing cars."
Dan's face lit up a whole lot.
"Dude! Where?!" Dan exclaimed, looking out the windshield with anticipation of being flashed by a hot chick.
Edward buried his face in his hands at Dan's display of stupidity.
Derek chuckled at Dan's display of stupidity.
You shake your head at Dan's display of stupidity.
The American way scorns Dan's display of stupidity.
I will now shut up about Dan's display of stupidity.
Dan, still eager to be flashed, scans the road for a hot chick.
But with his attention diverted, his actions gives room for dangerous things to happen in this situation.
Suddenly, a boulder hit the road a few feet away from the car, and Dan slammed on the breaks as Dan saw the huge boulder.
All of the guys breathed a sigh of relief as their lives were saved.
"Dude," Derek said, "pay attention to the damn road, I want to live to see tomorrow."
Dan kept on driving, dodging and evading boulders as they tumbled down the road.
"Man," Dan said, "this sure is going to be a boring chapter."
Derek, confused, asked Dan what the hell he was talking about.
Dan instantly forgot about his words, and denied ever saying them
Soon, the group started to quarrel amongst each other, until there was another close call, with a boulder landing about 13 inches away from the, and Dan slamming on the breaks.
After the sigh of relief, Derek spoke
"Okay, guys," Derek said, "let's stop distracting Dan, so we can all live to see tomorrow."
None of the guys spoke again, until they were clear of Avalanche Hill.
They saw the famous Neon lights approach them as soon as the cleared the Hill.
The Diablo stopped right in front of Dan's car.
"Greetings," Ben Tusi said, over some sort of Megaphone in the car, "we have come to equip you with supplies."
Dan got out of his car, and walked over to Ben Tusi. The door to shotgun was raised through hydraulics. Dan bent over, and peered through the open door. As he stood there, he asked Ben Tusi for supplies
Ben Tusi responded warmly by giving Dan six Mag-Lights, the huge, heavy and bright flashlights that double as a melee weapon.
After Dan received the Mag-Lights, he asked Ben Tusi a question.
"This town, to us, in our situation," Dan began, diplomatically, "has become a dangerous and uncertain place. Do you have any information that will guide us through the Gardens?"
Ben shook his head.
"We see nothing there," Ben said in a grim tone, "even the County Sheriff fears the Gardens. No one returns."
Dan walked back to his car, and Ben Tusi's Lamborghini Diablo sped down the Cliffside, dodging the boulders easily and effortlessly.
Dan got into his car, and started up the engine.
"Ben Tusi said 'no one returns.'"
Derek, Dan, and Edward began to laugh a laugh that was not unlike Butt-head's moronic laugh.
Than, after about three minutes of laughing, Derek said, "I don't get it."